In continued blathering about National Adoption Month I have more disjointed thoughts for you. They have to stay disjointed because apparently when I try to make sense I end up going for a week without being able to post anything. And so you can have fragments. Or you can read what I said last year.
- It’s something like 99% of people pass their home study. I think that’s our first indication that something is wrong with the adoption system. That’s less screening people out and more squeezing money out.
- I grumbled about the “training” that we had to do before we adopted because of course I knew how to parent! (cue crazy laugh) and now on the other side I grumble because the “training” that we had to do was totally useless. U.S.E.L.E.S.S.
- I definitely have learned a ton from the adoptee and first parent blogs that I read. I think in some ways they’ve made me walk with more trepidation through raising Boohoo, but I think it’s a good thing.
- Going through my own struggles with attachment and the formation of our family (which I chose) I think I will be able to support Boohoo through her own questioning/anger/sadness/experience as she grows up and can think more critically about adoption. I don’t think it will be easy, but I think I will be able to “hear” her, believe in her right to express herself, and be there for her in whatever capacity she wants at the time. (I don’t even know if that makes sense now that I see it in writing, but I know what I mean, lol.)
- Every adoptee should have their original birth certificate. Duh.
- I got a rare, but distinctly unfriendly double-take the other day when I had the kids at Target.
- We are in the very beginning phases of hopefully house-hunting and while we’ve chosen a city that is split nearly 50-50 as far as races go now I’m worrying about specific neighborhoods. Am I supposed to do a stake-out?
- We’re also looking for a new church, again one that is racially diverse and it’s way harder than it ought to be.
- I am not against UNICEF.
- I thought about going back to the beginning of my blog to read some of what I said about adoption, but decided I didn’t want to know (right now) how much of a shmuck I’d been.
- I get really aggravated when I hear people talk about Ethiopia like it’s one giant mission trip extravaganza.
- I don’t like the pregnancy = adoption process analogies that go around
- I was not prepared for how different it is (for me anyway) to have biological children and an adopted daughter. Everyone I talked to told me that it was the same. I have found that to be a huge lie.
- I am absolutely exhausted by parenting lately…nothing to do with adoption really, more just raising three preschoolers.
- I would adopt again. I’m nearly positive. In the future.
- I would adopt Boohoo again although if I’m getting this “relive my life” wish then I would do it differently, to set us up for more success.
- Again with the wish thing, I wish I could have been better for Boohoo, especially the first year. I wish I had been better.
- Anytime it's necessary for me to distinguish specifically adopted or biological child (which is usually just on the blog, though sometimes not, the point is, it's not a ton of times) I don't like it. I find it skeevy. It's actually a false distinction. Boohoo is not made of high grade plastic, she's not a Cylon, she's not a robot running off Energizer batteries. She's biological. She's not "of my biology" but she's biological.
